November 2011
9 posts
latterman:
I will write about the following, anonymously leave one in my ask box
Dear person I hate,
Dear person I like,
Dear ex bestfriend,
Dear bestfriend,
Dear mom,
Dear dad,
Dear Santa,
Dear future me,
Dear person I’m jealous of
Dear person I had a crush on.
pleaes please pleassssse thx
Give me something to write about
Children
Not too sure how hyped I am knowing I’m going to be working with kids.
They’re like loud, little midgets that pick their nose and eat glue.
I’m going to teach these kids the Jedi way, so at least I’ll have SOME fun on the job.
I get sick every time I eat.
I hate this, I WANT FOOD.
What's a girl to do?
My BIG day is coming up in less then 2 weeks. And by BIG day I mean, graduation. The day you step across the stage into an invisible wall that crosses you over to adult hood.
Tonight as I was writing out invitations, I noticed my mom wanted me to invite my stepdads mother.
I instantly thought “If Patty comes, she’s going to bring Jim, her fiancé.”
Jim, grandpa Jim was my...
I am as smitten as 5 kittens.
She makes me so happy.
I don’t have to pretend to be someone I’m not when I’m with her and I certainly don’t feel uncomfortable when I’m with her.
I love laying in bed with her, tracing my hands on her soft skin & giving her goodnight kisses.
I’m in love with the fact that she snuggles with me, something no one else ever did with me before.
Though all...
New tumblr?
I used tumblr years ago, then it kinda turned into a journal for me whenever I was thinking about Brandon and needed to type it all out.
Now that I actually want to use it again, I’m thinking a new one.
New chapter in my life why not a new Tumblr too.
I shall work on this.
September 2011
3 posts
I don't know what I want
I ask for you to visit me in my dreams, but when you do and I wake up, it’s like you died all over again and it hurts just as much. I am so incredibly happy when you visit me.
Last night, you came and surprised me. We took a walk, I showed you off to everyone saying, “see? I told you he wasn’t dead, he’s mine forever now.” but the minute I woke up, I was crushed.
I...
This time
3 years ago, around this time, was when you came into my life. This weather reminds me of when I would lay outside and talk to you for hours just getting to know each other, telling our life stories and most importantly, falling in love.
This time 2 years ago, we were putting our relationship back together. I was going absolutely crazy without you and I was doing things I regret. We fought, we...
August 2011
1 post
I saw you in my dream
The moment I woke up this morning, I started crying. It was tears of happiness and saddness. happy that I got to see you, hold you, kiss you. Sad that I was awake, I didn’t get to see your face anymore.
The moment I saw you I couldn’t stop kissing you and holding on to you. I have never been so happy in my life.
I used to say id give anything to have you back, now id give anything...
July 2011
1 post
Alone time with you is the best time.
Sometimes ill lay in bed, with the lights off, candles lit, Pandora radio on with your shirt in my arms and picture next to me and just lay with you.
ill sing to you, talk to you and just feel your presence.
no words can explain how much I miss you.
This isn’t right, you being gone. I’m not ready to let you go, I love you so much.
Rest in peace baby.
May 2011
2 posts
“I’ve already found what most people search for their whole lives. True...”
– Karah Rae Morgan
I miss you more and more everyday
I hate knowing that there’s a chance you could be alive if I hadn’t been so stupid. I hate that my first love is dead.
Everynight I pray this is all a hoax and that in a few years, you’ll come back.
I cry at night and hold onto my pillow and say your name over and over again as if that’ll make you come back.
Sometimes I can’t wait to go to sleep, because its my...
April 2011
5 posts
Dear Anonymous
I love you,
but you make me hate myself everyday.
Brandon wouldn’t want to see me like this, but I can’t distance myself from you.
if there is a 'God'
I believe he put you in my life for a reason.
You gave me the ability to love, you gave me a reason to smile again, you pulled me out of a hole I never thought id get out of. You showed me that I can be loved, and I’m worth something. You made me want to live again.
If ‘God’ is real, he put perfection, you, into my life and took you away from me when I needed you most to show...
inthelandof-finn asked: What time is it?
March 2011
1 post
“I need you more then ever before. You are my forever.”
February 2011
6 posts
Anonymous asked: I hope you don't mind me asking this, but my first love passed away as well so I can relate... so I'm just interested in the story of how/why his life was taken?
Anonymous asked: karah, you are so pretty and you write so well.
I never want to believe you're gone
I’d be happy living in a memory with you for the rest of my life.
Loving Brooke, and having the chance to have loved you is the best thing that has ever happened to me. My life is already fulfilled more then most, in their whole life. I hope one day, one day when I’ve passed too, we can be together again. I just hope you see how strong I’m trying to be, for you.
Reminds me of you
This years love had better last Heaven knows it’s high time I’ve been waiting on my own, too long When you hold me like you do It feels so right, oh now Start to forget how my heart gets torn When that hurt gets thrown Feelin’ like I can’t go on. Turnin’ circles time again Cut like a knife, oh now If you love me got to know for sure Cuz’ it takes something more...
Davin
I woke up the other morning with a message from Davin.
“I never thought we’d see each other again” it said. It took me a minute to realize, he was Brandons best friend. He called me, told me things about Brandon, things I didn’t know. It felt good to hear he felt the way I did. It felt good to talk to someone who loved Brandon as much as I did. I’m glad I have him in...
January 2011
1 post
I can't believe you're dead..gone for good.
December 2010
8 posts
I know you'd hate that a Miley Cyrus song reminds...
But after we broke up, I heard “Bottom of the Ocean” for the first time, and I bawled my eyes out because it was like my song to you,
but now that you’ve past it’s even more of my song to you.
“In a dream you appeared,
and for awhile you were here
so I keep sleeping
just to keep you with me”
I miss you
I wish I wasn't such a crappy writer..
So I could write about you, and not sound so stupid.
Everything I write about you is from the heart.
"For a second I thought about what life would be...
The last time we were ever together I remember sitting in your car, and it was raining. We were sitting there just listening to music and I was chewing on my straw and started crying, and you did as well, then you asked me
“what’s wrong?” and I told you “For a second, I thought about life would be like without you, and I don’t think I’ve ever felt pain bad...
Brandon Scott Mckaskle
If you have been following me on Tumblr, you’ve more then likely seen this name numerous times. He was my first love, my best friend, the biggest impact on my life. ON October 16th, 2010 he passed away, and I didn’t find out till his birthday, December 10th. Everyday I will write to him, hoping he knows how much I truely miss him.
Brandon, We started dating on October 22nd, 2008. You...
It's been over 2 months
And I still get a shortness of breath, A feeling as if my heart is being squeezed, and my throat is closing. I still cry myself to sleep all the time. I try to be strong, I try to be happy. The saying “I can be in a room full of people and still feel alone” now pertains to me. I haven’t felt this alone, this empty my whole life. I just want what we used to have back. I love you
October 2010
1 post
Photographs and memories
I keep your picture by my bed for when im feeling sad And i dont know why i would be. The way your smile looks so real I feel like i could start to understand your grace. And i dont understand why you’re Not here with me. And i dont even wanna know where else You’d be. Cause i have photographs and memories of the times When you weren’t on my mind and i was alone. And i have...
September 2010
5 posts
I had to say goodbye to a piece of my life
Rest in peace Christy Hoffman.
I remember when I was 5, it all began
You were my bus driver
You were my babysitter
You were my moms best friend
You were my 2nd mom
Your son was my WWE champion partner
Your daughter was always Baby Spice when we played Spice world
They were my best friends
Your husband, Bob, was the dad I never had
He always made me spegttios
You would give me a piece of...
I cannot wait
Till we have a family together, and it’ll be the right time.
Fridays have become the most hopeful of my days
The day I get to see the guy with my heart
The day I get to kiss him, for the week I didn’t get to
The day I get to lay with him for hours, and snugggle
The day I get to love him alllll night
I get to wake up to the small of his morning breath and farts
I get to sit outside and smoke every 10 minutes
I get to hold your hand
I get to play with your hair and kiss you multiple...
I'm just one big medical mystery
July 2010
1 post
4.18.10
May 2010
1 post
March 2010
8 posts
14999.) Despite the states between us, I can't...
No falling once you're down
Shackled sun reheats the streets upon which we have flown,As winter’s dying, spring starts crying for his stolen throne, And we keep running, searching, falling, pouring out our bones, Through eyes that grab us, beat us, stab us, the ones we need the most. Slow down, please slow down,We cannot start again, There’s no jumping out,No falling down once you begin
Looking back
and reading all those sappy love notes I wrote on here about guys, makes me a little sick. Thank god I don’t have the ability to love anymore, ahah.
I’m coming up only to hold you under...